Author: Eric

Thoughts, Words and Actions

In my last post I gave you a glimpse of how I manage my life. I didn’t quite describe it as “life management,” but you get it.

So if life is a composition, then what are the notes?

Thoughts, words and actions are the notes. They are the power in the music. Thoughts, words and actions will determine the beauty or the ugliness of the composition. Even more importantly, the hearer will be influenced. Daunting.

I’m always floored when I think of how many people manage life by accident. The jumping from thing to thing, just to land in a place I don’t recognize doesn’t appeal to me. I want to make deposits into eternity.

Considering that more than a few people have seen me as a man from mars, for putting so much emphasis on the composition, explains a lot.

I’ve made some mistakes with my choice of notes. I sometimes tried to play a dance song, when I should have played a ballad. I sometimes had the volume too loud, when a soft melody would have sufficed. Just the same, I keep practicing. I keep practicing because I want my life to sound something like this:

The Composition

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I’ve been reflecting on how life is much like a musical composition. My love for Miles Davis is not a mystery for many, but his art has impacted my life on so many levels. If you read anything about his musicianship, often you’ll find statements about his ability to know where to place notes, and use very few notes to create beauty.

We’ve been given a few notes to play and a limited time to play them.

Every day I wake up, I’m confronted with a composition (my life) and the choice of notes to play. The notes chosen will mean everything-today and into eternity.

Funny, when I was always “busy” I played a lot of notes. A virtuoso to the world, but hollow inside. I can vividly remember thinking the notes were not mine. So why do it? Pressure to be, pressure to say, pressure to find, is all I can come up with. Time has a way of ridding you of this, if you let it. I got older and started wondering “what the hell am I doing?”

Reducing notes in order to play the true ones is not an overnight thing, and at some levels the temptations always lurk in the shadows. My current state has taken almost 10 years to get to. But I am fully alive in the process.

The following is how I approach the composition (life) and the notes I’ve been given:

  • I let God inform me daily
  • I review the melody of the day and play it over in my head and heart
  • I look for opportunities in all facets of life.
  • I don’t have expectations, I take what He gives me and I play
  • I always remember, like Miles, that I only need a few notes.

Beauty follows.

 

 

Blind Spots

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Arrogance produces blind spots. Think of the farmer here, he/she plants the seed, and in the not so distant future there is a crop. The only difference is blind spots are nearly invisible to the human being possessing arrogance.

This is one dangerous game.

Often those who are arrogant pride themselves in having much figured out. There’s no room for not being right. To be wrong is to be less than. Each interaction is fueled by this drive, not to mention the deep insecurities that plagues.

I am a former member of the above tribe. I endeavor everyday to see things as they really are, even if I can’t figure it all out. Some days are misses, and somedays I live out the truth. No matter the outcomes, I know I can’t allow the seed of arrogance to take root. If I don’t stay committed, the blind spots will look like this:

  • I will believe that I have a right to justice. Not the justice from a civic point of view, but from a human relationship perspective
  • I will believe that I am untouchable, even though rationally I know this can never be
  • I will believe my possessions, accomplishments and titles are validations of my point of view
  • I will believe people are a means to an end
  • I will awaken one day and find I am truly alone, and no remedy will be near.

What are your blind spots?

 

Some Random Thoughts

Some random thoughts running through my mind this morning.

  • The clock is ticking for you and I, just like it is for the cancer patient. Make the most of your opportunities.
  • Words we think are as powerful as the words we speak.
  • I think it’s important to consider the trade-offs every decision will bring.
  • Who says the fairy tales/epic tales aren’t true? Where’s the proof? The population must believe they are. Look at some of the highest grossing films of all time.
  • Elitism is dying, but won’t go down without a fight. Are you in the fight.
  • God gives gifts, so we can give them away to others.
  • The leadership vacuum is being filled with arrogance, lies, greed and fear. Maybe it’s not too late to turn around.
  • Be careful of the dogmas you embrace. They will go right to your soul.

No More Taking Things for Granted

A re-post and reminder.

New York - On the rock - Empire State Building

September 11 is only a couple of days away.  For those living in America (and beyond), it is a sacred day.  As well it should be.

I remember much about that day 10 years ago.  It still shapes much of my thinking as a context for the life I lead now.  The events left me exposed.  In the sense that I was trying to find my way with the wrong compass.

I heard the stories of mothers, fathers, brothers, and sisters who would never come home again.  I felt sad.  But there I was, taking for granted so much in my life.  I was a little lost and wandering what my role (the real one) was to play.  It took some years after 9/11 to get to the following place:

I am no longer in the business of taking things for granted.

At some point events converged and I began to see my life as a whole and not just parts.  And again, it took me time to understand it and live it.  Twists in the road made for much sickness.  It was a process that I worked (still do) and committed to.  I didn’t want to be that person who woke one day to find he’d never really lived.

An odd thing occurred last week at a talk I attended.  I was asked what my greatest fear was.  The answer:

Not doing meaningful work, paid or otherwise.

For me it was a gut check on what I believe, what I value and whether I was willing to see my mission through until the end.  I know this post won’t bring anyone back or heal a broken heart, but it’s worth noting I am no longer in the business of taking things for granted.  Maybe that’s the best tribute I can give.

Making Relationships Last

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In the personal and business realm, we all seek to make our relationships last. It makes perfect sense. The good relationships we protect, the bad relationships we seek to discard. Reality is found in how challenging it is to manage the in-between.

This past week I was referred to an individual who I hadn’t seen or talked to in over ten years. When I was given his name I didn’t fully remember him. When we finally spoke on the phone it came rushing back. The first and only meeting was brief, and hadn’t shown anything that appeared to be lasting. Fast forward to now, he went out of his way to help me on a number of fronts. He really helped me.

So what’s the point?

Some relationships, like marriage or a client, can be in your daily/weekly. Other relationships come and go. The key to remember is you and I have been given a powerful cement. This cement is given to build and solidify our relationships. Sadly, many don’t realize they have it and many don’t see it as important. The cost of ignorance and stupidity is high. The cement requires action on our part to be effective. It is an on purpose pattern.

I don’t if the gentleman I mentioned above did what he did because I applied the right amount of cement to our brief time together so long ago. One thing is certain, I made the attempt. My gut tells me it made a difference.

The moral of the story is never take any relationship for granted.

5 Questions with Carl Reid, Author of 10 Powerful Networking Tips of Influential People

10 Powerful Networking Secrets of Influential People

Had the pleasure recently to interview Carl E. Reid about his book, 10 Powerful Networking Secrets of Influential People. The book gives some insightful tips on networking, and leaves you with ideas you can implement today. I really appreciate Carl’s heart.

 

In the book you re-tell a story about your wife and a $700 phone bill. Why was that story important then, and still is today?

High tech is no substitute for HIGH PERSONAL TOUCH. Using the phone to stay in touch with people in your network, especially 5 star connections, is the next best thing to “in person” meet-ups. In the mid 1990’s telephone companies were charging per minute rates. My wife was livid every time I paid a $700 to $800 monthly telephone bill. After a couple of years she once commented “you’re always calling people, but very few call you. When they call, they usually want something”. The jaw dropping look on her face was priceless when I responded with “honey, if anything ever happens to me you can call anyone in my contact database and they will help you, without hesitation”. I never again heard another word from my wife about the telephone bill. Pinging people via a telephone conversation or even leaving a voice mail is a personal high touch way of closing the distance gap, no matter where a person lives around the world. It makes for warmer, trusted relationships.

The process you advocate is very organized. What benefits would someone gain by being organized?

Hollywood director, Steven Spielberg said it best “Success is when opportunity meets the prepared mind”. To achieve any worthwhile personal or business endeavor, nimble planning is required. Opportunities can be created by a definite plan of action with completion dates and enough flexibility for unexpected situations. Networking requires organization with scheduling events, reaching potential connections, follow up and most importantly you have to nurture relationships regularly.

What are your thoughts on the current state of networking-on-line and off?

Trusted business associate and author of book “Win The Race For 21st Century Jobs“, Rod Colon says “networking is to a business career what oxygen is to life. You won’t last long without either one”. More than any other time in history, networking in the 21st century plays a vital role for accomplishing personal and business goals. Most people misunderstand networking as being performed only when you need something, not as life time continuous process. Whether networking on-line via social networks on the Internet or meeting people in person (off-line), the trip wire is only focusing on what you want to get out of the relationship. Zig Ziglar says it best “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care”. When meeting people on-line or off-line the most powerful networking statement anyone can say is “How can I help you?”.

Chapter 10 of the book discusses the “Rainmaker.” How important is it for an individual to become a rainmaker?

The truth is anyone has the potential be a Rainmaker. More salary income increases, recognition promotions, job security and business opportunities are bestowed on Rainmakers, before other employees or business owners. Everyone is expendable at work. Being a Rainmaker creates the very cool perception of you being INDISPENSABLE in the minds of those key decision makers. When I was consulting at a high profile bank, I was still left standing when the layoff axe swung at 2,000 employees and other consultants around me. When I asked the director what kept me from getting axed, he said “you provide value beyond what we hired you for and as I’ve seen your networking in action, I think you have people in your network I might need if I get laid off.” The hallowed title of “Rainmaker” is not always bestowed upon the swiftest, fastest, smartest or toughest.

Do you have any stories of networking gone wrong?

During a conversation, just beyond a brief introduction at a networking event, this person says to me “I just realized you can’t help me. Would you mind if I moved on to meet other people?” Without blinking, I say “No problem. Great talking with you.” As he turned away from me, I burst out laughing. He looks back in my direction with a puzzled look and asks me “what is so funny?” In “cool hand Luke” style I say “You’re right, I can’t help you. But I just thought of 3 people in my network who might may be able to help you or be interested in your service.” Once he lifted his jaw off the floor, he tries to back pedal to justify his previous statement. It was so obvious he wanted the names of those people I knew. I cut him off and said “I’m sorry, I have to meet some other people who might need my help”. I turned abruptly and left him standing there. The moral of the story is EVERYONE can potentially be gateway to other people. The pizza delivery person, the UPS guy, a per chance meeting in Walmart, your child’s tutor or the office janitor may provide gateway connections to other people just as easily as those people in your immediate circle. Never discount the value of anyone you meet.

 

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With corporate travels from the mail room to the board room, Carl E. Reid knows what it takes to be successful. An early adopter of Intrapreneur career management, Carl has over 46 years of business experience, including 32 years as a technology expert, 22 years as a business career coach and 25 years as a successful entrepreneur. Carl has been a professional blogger and social media strategist since 2004. In addition to being a sought after speaker and published author, Mr. Reid has coached and inspired hundreds of people to land jobs and start successful businesses. Carl is Executive Director for Empowering Today’s Professionals, career management educational non-profit. Working with over 50 companies in diverse industries during a 46 year business career, some of Carl’s clients include IBM(technology consulting), JP Morgan Chase (global banking), OXYGEN (TV/media), Sotheby’s (auction), New York City Health & Hospitals, Shearman & Sterling (legal), McGraw Hill (publishing), Moët Hennessy – LVMH, Insurance Services Office.
To get a copy of 10 Powerful Networking Secrets of Influential People visit www.10NetworkingSecrets.com – Contact Carl via email IGetSmart@SavvyIntrapreneur.com

The Fear of What’s Next

A re-post from 2013.

If you’re like me, the fear of what’s next is a thought process to be managed. It should be managed and not avoided. Keeping it real means recognizing the fear for what it is. No fake confidence, no dogged determination to ignore, just managing the fear when the visit happens. And it will happen.

A great friend and mentor told me a long time ago that God will give you enough light for the next step-no more and no less. There are many implications and applications with that counsel, but a big one is being in the moment you’ve been given. There is no greater arrogance that believing you’ve got more time than what’s right in front of you.

Many live like they have a thousand tomorrows.

In my current frame I’m learning and practicing the art of being in the moment and finding contentment in that “enough light for the next step” reality. I’ve moved from knowing, getting it in my head, to understanding, getting it in my heart. I feel fully alive.

I can’t recommend enough the learning of the above.

The context is this, and a paradox it is. The fear of what’s next is about our desire to control, to be comfortable and to avoid risk. Very human and very real. Can you really be living while you juggle those three distortions? Your life is found in the unknown and uncharted waters. No other way to find it.

Risk

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It didn’t take me long, as a kid, to know I was born an entrepreneur. A risk-taker who understood that to live, is to risk.

 

a person who organizes and manages any enterprise, especially a business, usually with considerable initiative and risk.

 

The above definition is from dictionary.com and notice the word any.

I wasn’t the kid selling lemonade on the street corner for twenty-five cents. Though I had similar ventures way back when. I liken my path as a life entrepreneur, who had varied enterprises, with varying levels of risk. Each of them shaping who I have become today.

I haven’t always gotten it right or been celebrated for my achievements. Quite frankly, some of my biggest successes are ignored to this day.

So I think…

What are you risking today? Are you involved in any tremors or ripples? Have you stood up when most remain seated?

Embrace risk because it is a key to epic living.