Category: Coaching

Exposed and Transperent

"Never trust a leader who hasn't suffered."

    -John Eldredge

I've heard it many times before that who we really are is revealed in crisis.  I didn't fully own that reality until I tasted my own crises.  Taste is a humbling thing.

I'm sitting at church yesterday and we're listening to a message on marriage relationships.  And it occurred to me that my wife is probably the only human on the planet that can speak with authority on who I really am.  I did think about running out screaming a few choice words, but I refrained.

Last night I asked my wife about what she saw when I was exposed and found transparent a few years ago.  She told me she saw change.  The foundation/core was consistent with who she knew me to be.  But there was a change being formed before here eyes-with pain included. 

So why the attempt at avoiding the crises?  More than likely most have never been mentored/taught on the benefits.  Let's face it, we tend to prefer the yellow brick road.  I think the road to ruin is paved that way.  It's difficult these days to dispense words like these because there are far too many messages to the contrary.  Competing with those messages authentically can be a challenge.  I'm glad my heart is in this.

The conclusion is this; leaders are defined in the times of exposure and transparency.  This applies to all of us.

Diminishing Return

If you're like me, a type A, then the idea of one more call or sentence is a lure.  But the reality is we reach diminishing return well before we think.  This is not only an issue for type A people.  It really flows through our culture (in America at least) the idea of time versus results.

I know a COO of a new non-profit start up that is instituting a 35 hour work week-mandatory.  He believes efficiency fades after 35 hours.  How innovative! 

I wonder how many of our working hours are made up diminishing returns?  I would say a minimum of 20%, and I think I'm being conservative.  Especially when you line up work hours with the stated mission of many organizations.

In the end, the most important thing is to know the following:

  • What's the most important thing to be accomplished.
  • Figure out how to get the most important things done.
  • Make sure you have the resources needed to get those things done.
  • Measure success.
  • Stop when you know diminishing return has set in.

How Inspiration Works with Vision

 

I watched this video and thought of how inspiration sometimes comes. 

I told my wife that I wanted to cook her dinner at our home served on white table linen, excellent food and excellent wine.

The video is also representative of how vision connects to inspiration.  If you are inspired by someone, or something, you will be able to see it occurring.  Seeing the outcome living out is essential.

The best sight is the one that comes from your soul to your mind.

Prepared to Lead?

Where would we be without the media (Internet, paper, your organization, your boss, etc.)?  Constant messaging about what's important-usually relating to their own selfish motivations.  Wasn't it Hearst who said his organization was in the business of selling newspapers, not reporting the news?  Regardless, you're hearing it everyday.

I mention the above to gage if any of the information we absorb is preparing us to lead.  By now, I would think we know how important leadership is.  Everyone would agree that quality leadership is vital in good times and in the crisis times.  See the U.S. Congress for a great example of how some leaders never get this. 

The problem lies in our reluctance to experience the upfront pain of growing and changing.  For some this happens immediately, for others a little after the event or show is over.

Why do we give up and give in?

Here are some reasons to consider:

  • The microwave oven.  Take your growth and heat for three minutes, on high, and voila instant change.
  • Success.  We think our success says something more than it does.
  • Busy lives.  We say yes to everything and never learn the art of saying the leader's most important word; no.
  • The media has convinced us that by becoming leadership voyeurs, we have all we need.
  • We look for leadership love in all the wrong places.

Making Urgency Real

 

I received an email today from a publicist at Harvard Business Press wanting to connect about John Kott'er's newest book A Sense of Urgency.  It didn't take me very long to respond, with excitement, about reviewing a copy.  After reading, I will post my thoughts on this blog.

John Kotter is brilliant and thoughtful.  He truly has impacted my thinking over many years. 

The above video provides some clues to how urgency connects to change.

Ready to Die, Ready to Live

In a speech yesterday I told a group of businesswomen that you're not ready to live until you're ready to die.  Easy for me to say, right?  Well…no.  Seal (see the clip above) has some poetic thoughts on the matter of dying.  But I don't want to stray to far from the meaning of this story.

It wasn't until I got serious about the things I couldn't see (love of family and love of people), that I starting confronting the urgency of this limited time offer call life.  I apply the idea to work too.

The businesswomen yesterday got my meaning.  Those truly passionate about what they do carry a sense of the ending.  People like this believe that the story titled our life has a beginning, a middle, and an end.  It clarifies and refines how we approach everything.

If we get close to this idea we might get the following:

  • No more playing around with destructive words and behaviors.
  • No need for the next generation of DVD technology.
  • Dinner with the entire family every night.
  • No more preoccupation with fame and fortune.
  • Embracng the moment with all you connect with.
  • Taking care of our bodies like the gift they are.
  • Seeing people as more valuable than material goods.
  • Taking responsibility for our lives.

The Meaning of Vision and Goals

Mountain range photo

 

Conducted a workshop this weekend for a company around vision and goals.  It was a great group to work with.  I was truly honored to leave my imprint on their management team.

I got to thinking this morning about why vision is a necessary part of goal setting.  The formula goes something like this:

Vision is the why and what, while goals are the how.

It’salso important to rememberber that vision develops over time (Thank you, Rick and Terry).  The old Polaroid camera can be a great object lesson here.

A Prophet

Any amateur prophet can predict the future after the future becomes the present.  The professionals predict even while they face the storm of criticism and isolation.

Makes you wonder who and what we're listening to.

What Do You Mean by Life-Long Learner?

Overheard a lady today talking/complaining about the difficulty in finding a job.  I don't know if her lack of employment was due to attitude, or the business cycle.  I felt for her.

What struck me though, was her statement that she was educated and that not being able to find a job made no sense.  Don't know what level of education she was speaking of, but she seemed confident of it's ability to garner a good job.

The expectation of completed education providing a well paved road to a job is a problem.

In the age (early 21st century) we live in you'd be well served to be a life-long learner.  I define this as someone who continually seeks to gain knowledge-formal or informal.  Life-long learners seek to apply what they learn and they understand the art of "process."  The art of process is the idea of no arrivals or destinations. 

Here are some tips for becoming/staying a life-long learner:

  1. Expect challenges and don't get comfortable.
  2. Explore areas you wouldn't normally seek out.  For example, buy a book on economic cycles over the last 50 years.  By doing this you'll gain understanding on how our economy ebbs and flows.  Who knows you might stop connecting your future career condition to Obama and McCain.
  3. Be diverse.  Go find others with different lenses than yours.  You don't have to agree with them to learn from them.
  4. Find your destiny.  Not enough time to go through that process here, but those that know their destiny tend to see the importance of learning.
  5. Don't be event minded.  Just because you go to the seminar at work doesn't translate to change.  And we all know that change should equate to learning.

The Art of Not Forgetting

In our frenzied business culture, the tendency is to fly through.  We do this thankful we made it on time to the next meeting.  But what about the forgetting?  You know, the thing you thought was spot on.  This happens way too often to leaders at every level of the organization.  Kind of makes sense when you think of all that comes at us.

If we're not careful, we'll find ourselves scratching our heads wondering what happened to our work and lives.  We'll find the unimportant to be great and the important to be good.  Turned around to be sure.

Is there a way to cease from the madness?  One way is to have a set group of values and become a slave to them.  For example, let's say your kids are your #3 value, but your career always causes you to miss the important events.  In this case, I would recommend you find a different career.  Your values should have good alignment with your employer-really.  Anything less is a mirage.

I see the following as great practice for the art of not forgetting:

  1. Your spouse has stuck with you for ten years-good times and bad.  Who else has done this for you?  Once a week for the next three months, spend five minutes reviewing all the ways he or she has been there for you.
  2. Maybe you're super successful in your career.  Success is almost a given for you.  Do same exercise as in #1 and think about when you needed help double-bad.
  3. Maybe you have friends that surround you.  Everyone wants to hang around.  Do the same exercise as in #1 and #2, and think about how many people would stick around if all you had was your name.

The above will create a habit of not forgetting, and maybe more importantly create an attitude focused on humility.  Isn't that what you want?

I started to write this post as a one sentence remembrance to those who lost their lives on 9/11/2001.  The sentence went like this:

    "I haven't forgotten 9/11/2001 or the people who lost their lives."

Seems the art of not forgetting is more important than I first thought.