First, I'm not turning into a romance novelist. But I am going to correlate romantic love with our work (the thing that is connected to our wiring).
I think a big problem with marriage and long-term relationships is the misconceived notion of what falling in love means. There is a reason they call it "falling." Falling implies a never-ending experience. Unfortunately, we find ways to stop falling and then everything changes-for the worse. For example, I know people in relationships where they love each other. But they're not in love anymore. No pursuing, no ache, no shakes, and certainly no flowers. They're together, but dead.
Does this sound like your work relationship?
Some out there may be thinking about refuting the above. You might be thinking about how the warm and fuzzy does not last a lifetime. You might be thinking that I don't know all the hurtful things he said.
I'm not writing this to make you feel bad about love gone wrong or shame you about a divorce. All I'm saying is that to sustain "falling in love" you must make a decision and manage it accordingly. Sometimes it will be effortless and sometimes it will feel like its killing you. But either way you have a decision to make.
So make it.
Here are some tips on staying "in love" with your work:
- Stop and ask yourself why you're spending 50+ hours doing what you do. Scot Herrick has a great post on how career management is about your dream.
- Stop thinking that your work will make you happy. If you're expecting it to make you happy, you'll quit when failure comes.
- Start thinking like an entrepreneur and not an employee. You need to see the true value of what you do, and entrepreneurss understand this.
- Stop hanging with the pessimists. These are the people that are always talking about the impending doom on the horizon.
- Staying "in love" leads to a great life.
- Do something different today. Surprise your work with a new approach.
- Stay a learner. Learning won't let you fall out of love.