Tag: busyness

The End of Hurry

norwaytunnel

I spent a lot of years being in a hurry. As I look back, I wonder what for. Learning is about the only thing.

I’ve found the end of hurry.

In my twenties, it felt like being a dog where your master is immaturity. I ran from, and to, thing after thing. I was full of anger, energy and arrogance. There was some tenderness and compassion. My wife was the one who brought those two things out. I honestly think she felt sorry for me in all of my storms.

In my thirties, I was still in a hurry. In this frame I saw things to be conquered and possessed. I had my eye on what was to be found over the horizon. I started to hear more friends and advisors say things like; “be here now” and “take time to reflect.” I wasn’t having any of it, at least in my behavior. I was at war, the tale of two Eric’s.

In my forties (now and coming to a close), I discovered how precious time is. Certainly, the reality of what’s left dawned on me. The more important awakening was:

  • About 20% of each day is where the gold is found. This is the stuff I put intense energy and effort into. The other 80% won’t be remembered or represent any true value in the end, and the end matters because you don’t know when it will be. Here’s the trick of it, God gives each of us something beautiful to discover (God, music, relationships, wine, a starlit night) every day. It’s not obvious to the person in a hurry and most of the time they miss it. When you find it (that 20%) the intensity of the moment lasts a lifetime. It is happiness, it is joy, it was what I was looking for. By the way, it really found me.
  • Yoga, yes yoga, grabbed me in an unexpected way. The movements and the wonderful breathes slowed me down and centered me. No exercise has meant more in my journey.
  • Wine taught me to linger. I don’t know anyone who gulps wine. As I started drinking wine for the health benefits, I found an added benefit of slowing down and enjoying my dinners and the accompanying wines. I didn’t realize what a life lesson it would bring me. Wine whispers to me to linger and slow down.

So, are you in a hurry?

The Problem with Busy

Busy 2 

I live in a community that has many families.  I think the last number I saw it was around 80-85% families.  Last night I took a step back and looked around a room of parents and wondered if anyone could look back on their day and find something meaningful (a mark left so that world would know you were alive and contributed) poured out?  Busyness is often a mask to hide our lack of purpose and happiness.  Despite that, I really believe most want purpose and meaningful pursuits.

One of the areas of opposition is living in an age where we've defined "leaving a mark" down and we've elevated busyness as our substitute.  In many ways we feel that a long list of activities produces substance.  It doesn't.  Enter stage left the mask of hypocrites.  We're great actors and actresses.  Giving the appearance that all is well and under control.  We even have calendars to prove it and make it so.  The problem with busy is it wears you down and out.  The scary part is found in our belief that the alternative (quality, focused priorities, meaningful work) is not an option.

Look around you, how has all this busyness benefited us?

I'm not here to define what should be meaningful in your life.  That's your job to tackle.  But here's an acid test to try at the end of your day today:

    The things i participated in today were meaningful because_________.

For some help, see my definitions of meaningful:

  •     Saying I love you consistently
  •     Time alone with God
  •     Laughter
  •     Helping my children answer the tough questions
  •     Being authentic
  •     Embacing nature
  •     Physical exercise
  •     Family dinners
  •     Encouraging people through Epic Living (the work within the org.)
  •     Managing and integrating what I value most into my daily existence