time Archives - Page 2 of 2

The Time Issue

26 February 2013February 26, 2013Eric

Time doesn't fly by and we don't have a "time issue." Time has been moving at the same pace as it always has and your time issue is more than likely an excuse.

As I write, I must plead guilty. Many times I've written those worn out cliches of:

Time goes by so quickly
Life is brief
Don't blink

I could go on, but I've slowly been coming to an awakening.

The reason we in America (maybe in other parts of the world too) feel like time goes so fast, is we are always:

Chasing after something
Wanting something
Afraid of losing something
Getting involved in something
Worrying about something

That group above will make you feel like your driving a high performance car on the Audubon-in all waking hours. Why not find your moment instead? Why not take the road less travelled? Why not take a risk and say no?

Being in the moment is not a worn out statement. I wish it were, then it might be an indicator that we've stopped the madness. Being in the moment is essential and everyone can do it, if they want. The scary part is many will wait to the end before they realize how much time they've burned.

America is in trouble for a number of reasons. Our abuse of time in the pursuit of "all of the above" is insuring a troublesome outcome. I'm convinced there is a desire, but as in many things, desire is not enough. I've moved to the place where I purposely, every day, find my moment. I have to.

Find your moment and turn around.

Managing Your Thoughts

1 February 2013February 1, 2013Eric

"Been thinking, more than writing these days. Hoping to get back here very soon. Many events of 2009 have conspired in a way not imagined."

-Epic Living Blog, Spring of 2009

The above quote came from me almost 4 years ago. Though I'm now in a different place, the words began pushing me to reflection.

Do I have a handle around my thoughts?

As we've entered into 2013, I've given a lot of myself to why thoughts matter. The good ones, the bad ones and how impactful the sum of the two have been on me, and others. This may seem like an obvious because we do it all the time…thinking that is. But what if the majority of our thoughts are made up of the following:

Worries
Regrets
Doubts
Fears
Bitterness

It is clear in my own walk that some of those examples fit my past thought patterns. I say past, because part of my growth plan for 2013 is to manage my thoughts with great energy and focus. I've lost too much time (literally) letting bad thinking rule the day.

One great example for me is the area of regrets. There was a time when I daily struggled with regrets over my choice of entrepreneurism. The fact that I began a new life in the area of entrepreneurism when I was at my pinnacle in the corporate world, the fact that I had 2 kids under 10 years of age, the fact that I had a big mortgage, provided fertile land for regrets. This was especially true since I felt my kids were growing up so fast and I was still trying to figure out who I was supposed to be. Ever heard this one in your head?

"I should have spent more time with her just being, but now she's a teen-ager and I wonder if she sees me as father that is there for her."

I could go on with more, but the point is time is precious and we don't have time (REALLY) to spend reviewing all the crap that comes and goes through our heads. It's a deception to believe every thought is worthwhile and a key to who you are. Most of the thoughts listed above are designed to bring you down, suck away your time and leave you standing gripped. What if you decided to let the negatives to just roll on by. Try it, you'll see that your world won't come to an end.

I am living these steps to manage my thoughts better:

Praying diligently to hold my thoughts captive. St. Paul has much to say on this topic
Practicing mindfulness. Andy Puddicombe has some great insights on this here
Staying away from those who see things as a half-empty affair
Keeping things real at all times
Continuing my practice of yoga

The Moment

10 January 2013January 10, 2013Eric

I know many are in goal-setting overload right now and as a follow-up to Tuesday's post, I'm going to chime in. Just not in a way you might expect. Here goes:

Don't set any goals for 2013.

The reason is quite simple. Until you have a moment, the moment, setting goals is more wishful thinking. You may feel better that you created a list or have a feeling of temporary validation, but it will fade. Trust me.

In my own journey I have found myself confronted with "the moment" multiple times, even when I didn't want to. The moment is a place and time where there's no more BS and there is the appearence of a crossroads. Sometimes it's life and death, sometimes it's a place where I've been humbled. Either way, the bridge was burned and change was waiting just beyond the flames and embers.

In 2004, my dad had an aortic aneurysm. It was caught in time and they operated to quickly address a very dangerous condition. My dad didn't tolerate anesthetic very well, so his recovery from surgeries could be dicey. On the day of the surgery, my mom called me at work to tell me that he wasn't coming out of the post-surgery anesthetic well and the doctors were concerned.

I went to the hospital that day "put out." I wondered how bad could it really be. You see, I was in a place of prosocuting my dad for his past sins. And I thought this was just another situation to get through. Besides, his sins were the real issues.

I entered his hospital room and found myself surprised and disarmed. He looked so fragile and vulnerable. Not the man I grew up watching. The moment had come. I felt like God was right next to me whispering "it's time to rest your case and forgive." The moment. That set forth a process of learning how to forgive and accept forgiveness. My dad passed away 5 years later.

You should also know that I spent time setting goals around my relationship with my dad in the preceding years. Multiple years of resolving and planning. You know the drill, "I will have breakfast once-a-month, I will go to a baseball game, I will invite him to, the list goes on. I never did it because there was never a moment.

I have learned some valuable lessons in the last few years. Two of the most important ones are the need for the moment and that I don't have to wait for the moment to come to me. The latter implies that you can humble yourself and look at your life soberly and make the move. Regardless, without out the moment goals rarely stick.

You want them to stick.

Don’t Save the Best for Last

2 November 2012November 2, 2012Eric

I wrote the following post almost 5 years ago. In some ways timeless. I'm convinced everyday that I don't "have time." A great sadness that many live everyday thinking they do.

I'm all for finishing strong/well. However, the myth of your best years being found in some future day is insane. I say that due to the importance of the choices you make now and how they will determine those years-taking for granted that you'll see them. Forever now!

I can't think of a more fitting place than our career to illustrate how this type of logic reigns. It's subltle and deceptive all at the same time. If a leader doesn't see his or her life as a whole, then a incongruent outcome is almost always certain.

As leaders seek to navigate a career and a life, I would suggest the following:

Think long and hard about value. Specifically, the value you're creating over time. In many ways it's like starring in your own motion picture. Create Epic Value for all those playing a part in your story. Keep in mind, there are no do-overs. You will either create value or you won't.
Before you read that next journal, newspaper or marketing pitch take a step back and question the motives of the messengers. For example, many marketers are dying on the vine, so selling is job 1. What they're selling might be designed to move you in a direction that isn't aligned with your destiny.
Stop thinking you have time. We're all terminal, its just that some know and some don't. Don't mean to go morbid here, but seeing life as a limited time offer should inspire you to stop screwing around with small desires (titles, money, fame, and power).
Be Authentic! Let the world see who you really are! If you don't like who you are or think that who you are has no value, then contact me and I can prove that you have a reason to be who you are.
Place more value on people than math, no matter how much the numbers say to do otherwise. Besides, if you're in a position where numbers matter more than people, be afraid, be very afraid.

See the below story from The Guardian/UK on Stephen King for more connection:

"The accident happened on June 19 1999. King was strolling alongside Route 5 near his home in Bangor and looking forward to seeing a film with his family later that evening. As he walked, a Dodge truck barreled towards him. It was driven by Bryan Smith, a drug user with multiple driving convictions. A Rottweiler called Bullet was loose in the truck and had jumped on to a seat where there was a cooler of hamburger meat Smith had bought for a barbecue. Smith became distracted by his dog, swerved across the highway and hit King. The writer managed to turn his head a little before impact and thus missed being struck by a steel support post on the truck that would probably have killed him.

King's head left a many-tentacled crack in the windscreen. He broke his right hip joint, four ribs and his right leg in nine places. His spine was damaged in eight places. "The accident gave me a real sense of mortality, a sense of hurry that I didn't have before. Not immediately, but about a year after the accident I was able to say: 'That guy nearly killed me.'" Smith died of an overdose 15 months later on September 21, King's birthday."

Life in Motion

10 August 2012August 10, 2012Eric

Life is in motion and in a constant state of flow-forward.

I told someone last week that time flys. They agreed in aknowledgement and understanding. It dawned on me right after the exchange that time has not increased or decreased its pace. Kind of sets one in a place of grappling with daily choices.

I am in awe of each day now. The realization that a significant part of my life has been lived. And before you think I live in a mystical world, where all is spinning in perfect balance, you should know that each day is a fight for what I believe. I make decisions that carry risk-some small and some great. I face fear and watch courage appear. I know I don't have as much time as I once did. I am driven.

There is a war going on.

Ever notice that not many will stop you and inquire about whether your living out your destiny? At some point life became way too complicated and many surrendered to the insanity. Almost like slaves that have resigned themselves to a life without freedom. Freedom to live, love and dream.

I realize my voice is somewhat faint in an overcrowded world full of gadgets, entertainment and medication. But I also realize I can't be silent. Kind of like the air in a deep breath. I'm in and out.