value Archives - Epic Living

Value

5 September 2013September 5, 2013Eric

I've been thinking a lot about value lately. Specifically, the conversations and presence with my kids. In the last seven years my core has been fully engaged with them. Not because I'm some rock star at parenting or a nominee for father of the year. Believe me, I've tripped and blown it more times than I care to remember. It has been a God-induced form of luck, struggles and on-purpose effort.

I didn't always find real value in my kids. I loved them and many times justified my career chasing as a benefit they'd reap from. I was afraid and self-absorbed. Always thinking I would get the time, find the time or that time would send me a relationship wrapped in red ribbons. It is about prioritizing and being deliberate about pouring yourself into the relationship. I was humbled by that truth. And, yes, it carries tremendous risk. Living always presents this and there is no living without it.

I'm now at a place where I understand true value and I am learning the art of living it out. Living it out means seeing, in the arena of my family, my relationship with them as equally valuable as a financial pursuit or a social engagement.

Here's the potential rub for you and me. If we're not careful we'll allow our career to dominate the other 7/8ths of life. Like a drug, we'll want (not need) that fix. You know, the feeling of importance, fake significance and most dangerously, identity. Don't fall for this, don't buy into your employer who tries to convince you that their most important should be your most important. Like Steven Pressfield's Resistance, in the book, The War of Art, there is something fighting against your best intentions.

A few years ago a friend of mine told me he thought I was courageous to walk away from a career that had taken over much of my life. I wasn't, but I did see (sometimes not clearly) value in life and living. That truth remains.

The Value of Life, The Value of Today

27 August 2013August 27, 2013Eric

Got to thinking this morning about worry and the time extinguished by it. I can't think of one instance in my life where worry has produced a breakthrough, happiness or satisfaction. You are probably thinking I've just entered the "duh" zone because we all know this. Right? The truth is many know, but few do.

So why bother worrying? Who taught us how to worry? Who wrote the book on the 10 Proven Success Strategies of Worrying?

The take-away is found in our lack of embrace of life and the time given (implies a gift) to us on this big ball known as Earth. We don't see our life as a whole, but parts. We pick and choose what we like (usually the pain-fee comfortable ones) and ignore or run from the others. Believe me, I understand that it's not all a matter of choosing the path you might be on. Some of us were influenced by parents, teachers, marketing, and society's version of the truth. We thought we were making the right choice. Like the person who places their trust in someone who seemed honest, but was just a good actor/actress. Regardless of that, we cannot excuse ourselves from making a change for the better.

The value of today has all but been erased in our thought process. We're too busy to stop and look around. Wer're rushing to things and outcomes that we can't be sure have any value at all. Almost like closing your eyes, jumping and hoping that what you've been taught will deliver. This is really a vivid portrait of a culture taking much for granted. We don't stop and ask the tough questions of why, does this fit who I am, is this meaningful to me?

So how much time do you have to get this life in order?

I'm throwing the following out to you as way of stopping you in your tracks:

Stop denying who you are! Stop stuffing the real you in a closet for the sake of the opinions of others. I think Steve Jobs referred to this as "others dogma." If you've decided to put all your chips on being someone else, then prepare to meet the real you further down the road.
Stop thinking you have time to get around to X or Y. This is akind to someone who continues to ignore their human relationships. They figure the other person doesn't need to hear certain words (I Love You) becuase they already know it's true. Goodbye is the usual outcome here. Warped logic.
Stop embracing your career as if having a great career will make everything else fall into place. Listen up, I tried this and it does not work.
Stop bankrupting your opportunities for happiness. This happens when you abdicate the choice of happiness to circumstances, people, etc.
Create a stop-doing list and create the margin your life has been screaming for. A stop-doing list is simply you evaluating the habits, events, etc. and making the concisous decision to stop.

The Value Proposition

3 January 2013January 3, 2013Eric

Welcome to 2013! In today's post I'm focusing on the value proposition. Not in relation to your investments or sales process, but your epic life. Don't turn away. Reading this may be the most important thing you do all year. Not because I'm such a great thinker or writer, but because your life is worth more than you can imagine. Sounds cliche doesn't it. Your awkward smile and feeling of embarrassment that you haven't paid enough attention to life's rhythm is hanging on your sleeve.

I watch people intently-live and written. I gauge their behavior and their words. I want to see if they really are as "whole" as they portray themselves to be. My review isn't to judge or make light, but to see if I've been given the opportunity to focus on helping them move to a place of Epic (their movie, their symphony, their happiness) Living. In many ways my blood runs with a sense of how their story unfolds.

We are in great danger.

I told a friend and fellow-pilgrim some time ago, that I've seen this recurring vision of a large building with an office full of people. On any given day I see a band of mercenaries planting bombs and traps for the people going in and out everyday. I have some experience with bombs and traps. I used to set them. How's that for irony? If you've been reading this blog for awhile, you know my story. In the end, my calling and mission is to save as many as possible. And, yes, I've been called and construed as one of the "crazy ones."

At this point in your story, I would like you to consider how the value proposition can create great odds for success. It will not be easy and it will create a crossroads, just a friendly warning.

Here's how to do it:

Turn off the world (the marketing, the people, the employers, etc.) before you begin this process. By the way, the world will not like this. If you ignore my warning here, you'll go into a form of mental slavery. Someone or something else will sieze control.
I'm giving you 5 diamonds worth millions, the rarest of the rare. Each one represents what you value most in life. Things like God, family, a cause, friends, career, etc. Choose wisely here.
Now, the condition of me giving you the diamonds is you must take care of and keep the value of the diamonds growing at an annual 10% clip each year. Every day in the given year will be the measuring stick. The take-away is, you must take care of your diamonds every day.
If you fail in number 3, you lose your life.
As an added bonus, I will stay with you during the year to help you with perspective and give feedback. I will only do this when you ask. It's your life after-all.

Intersted in this value proposition? You should be, you're already invested.

The New Net-Worth

5 August 2011August 5, 2011Eric

Measuring net-worth is a pretty linear process for many people/businesses. Just subtract your liabilities from your assets, and voila you have your net-worth. Right?

Where I live (USA), we all are dealing with a new paradigm. Some of us know it, some of us are denying it and some of us are just wondering in the desert. Regardless of where you fall on that list, change has come. Our lives are different and I sense it's permanent.

It's interesting to me how old habits die hard. Many are still rather obsessed about money and career. Still partying on the Titanic I guess. But what if money and career are only a part of your net-worth? Sort of like two rooms in your house versus the entire dwelling.

In our work we advise people to see their net worth in way that is representative of their entire life…8 areas specifically. The illustration below will reveal what those eight areas are:

If I asked you to calculate your net-worth based on the wheel, how much would you be worth? Are you in the black or in the red? How prepared are you for the harsh winds of change? And by the way, there are some who make six-figures who are actually very poor. It is tragic.

I think you've probably figured out that my post is not designed to get you to abandon money and career. But it is designed to get you to put things in their proper place. A place where you begin to integrate the 8 areas in a deliberate way.

Yes, it is tough work.

The take-away here is found in that new paradigm. If you think focusing only on career and money is a sound strategy, then I have some bad news for you. It worked (or so we deluded ourselves into believing) during the days of continual prosperity. But the truth is, it never worked and it certainly won't work now. We have now entered into an age where the danger of ignoring/neglecting our total life will produce catastrophic results. Maybe you've lost your job of 20 years and you never took the time to pay attention to your mental health, so managing the stress of job loss is crippling. Maybe your marriage has crumbled around you and your wondering why you didn't spend time listening to your spouse's needs. You get my point.

Turn around while you can, things have changed. If you're wondering how this work is accomplished, then stay tuned. We'll be working with our strategic partner Take Time for Life to present an experience that will show how managing your life (totally) can be done.