The above is a wonderful talk from Jason Fried. He makes numerous points, with suggestions on how to make it better, about the ironies that are found in the office. Can you relate?
No More Taking Things for Granted
A re-post and reminder.
September 11 is only a couple of days away. For those living in America (and beyond), it is a sacred day. As well it should be.
I remember much about that day 10 years ago. It still shapes much of my thinking as a context for the life I lead now. The events left me exposed. In the sense that I was trying to find my way with the wrong compass.
I heard the stories of mothers, fathers, brothers, and sisters who would never come home again. I felt sad. But there I was, taking for granted so much in my life. I was a little lost and wandering what my role (the real one) was to play. It took some years after 9/11 to get to the following place:
I am no longer in the business of taking things for granted.
At some point events converged and I began to see my life as a whole and not just parts. And again, it took me time to understand it and live it. Twists in the road made for much sickness. It was a process that I worked (still do) and committed to. I didn’t want to be that person who woke one day to find he’d never really lived.
An odd thing occurred last week at a talk I attended. I was asked what my greatest fear was. The answer:
Not doing meaningful work, paid or otherwise.
For me it was a gut check on what I believe, what I value and whether I was willing to see my mission through until the end. I know this post won’t bring anyone back or heal a broken heart, but it’s worth noting I am no longer in the business of taking things for granted. Maybe that’s the best tribute I can give.
Don’t Trust The Beast
A re-post from 2010.
You coexist with your business. It should not be your friend. It is a beast and not meant to be trusted. It demands much, but as it is with a circus lion, a chair and whip are in order. To think of that animal in any other light only invites ruin.
Sadly, many entrepreneurs, corporate slaves and others have wrapped their identities around the beast. It is a sad love affair. Just like the lover who swears this is the last one of many, a broken heart sits in waiting. By the way, you can know how tightly you’re wrapped by how much you think about the beast. The more you think, the tighter the wrap.
This post is not meant to talk you out of your business pursuits. As a matter of fact, it can be a fantastic tool for growth. The issue is one of ownership, not should I or shouldn’t I pursue a business idea/career.
Here are some solutions to the problem(s):
- Buy yourself a chair and whip. It might be in the form of cutting back on your hours or developing a fitness/exercise program. If you’re wondering what those two have to do with managing your business, look at the statistics around those who work long hours and don’t pay attention to their health.
- Look failure in the face and don’t back down.
- Start working smarter and stop trying to do everything. Rugged individualism may sound great in a speech, but it’s highly overrated.
- Re-evaluate your needs. In America two-thirds of the economy is based on consumption. Nothing wrong with consumption, but do you really need…
- Prepare for battle. The beast will not like you taking back control. This one is important. If you’re not careful you might give up, but don’t.
Don’t Let Career Snuff Out Your Dreams
Dreams are fragile things. They’re given as a spark, designed to turn into a flame. That flame should only go out if used to ignite the new dream.
That’s why I don’t want you to let career snuff out your dreams.
No surprise, but keeping our dreams alive is very hard work. More and more hard work is not esteemed. We’ve been programmed (deceived) to believe there’s an easier pathway. The reality remains, keeping dreams alive requires hard work. It’s worth all you have.
I see our dreams as brushstrokes on the canvas of our lives. We were made to dream.
The most insidious enemy of our dreams is career. Career is the ring, the untamed beast, the riptide. It can be mastered when one orders their lives. It be made to be slave if you have the courage to be who you are. If not, it will seek to be the dominate force in your life. I’ve been fighting for over ten years.
Here’s why:
- I want to make God smile
- I want my family to have a legacy rooted in the power of dreams
- I know the BS our society spews, is just that, BS. Didn’t always see that, but now I do
- It makes choosing happiness worthwhile
- Dreams are key ingredients in destiny
What are you doing with your dreams?
Working Through the Insecurities
This is a re-post from earlier this year. It was timely for me, maybe for you too.
If you’re a man or woman who sees vulnerability as a weakness, this post might not be for you. I still hope you’ll stick around as we work through the insecurities.
Insecurities are like demons or monsters that play the role of human disrupters. These creatures are always lurking in the shadows waiting for just the right moment to remind you and I of:
- How we failed
- How our work is not that great
- How much smarter the guy or gal next to us is
- How we’ll never be picked to play a major role
- How we are not worth the love we long for
Now remember, this is a You and I post. We’re traveling together on this war-torn road. Scars and such are a given here.
In the arena of life, insecurities have most in an iron grip. They cast you in iron and demand you become a slave. Some are by design, some by accident. You don’t need to look any further than how medicated western culture is, and the eastern culture is heading there as well. Our relationships suffer and we can’t seem to sustain connection.We use what is found under the sun to distract us from looking at ourselves soberly. It’s an evil thing, our insecurities. I hate to admit it, you hate to admit it, but we are our own worst enemy.
I’m someone who has identified and dealt with most of my insecurities. I didn’t do this alone. I’ve had multiple advisors over the years to help. I’m blessed by their willingness to stick with me through my insecurities. Whether it was my bravado hiding my fear of what people thought of me, or my doubts regarding the quality of my work. They stayed beside me, despite the ugliness. This is love. My friends, most don’t stay. It can be messy, it can be hard work, and it can be embarrassing. Do you have people who will stick with you?
I figure I owe you the ugly side now. We’re a mess, and all of the pop-humanist thought isn’t going to change that. Billions on education, health, leadership, technology, and we’re still slipping away. So many hiding places, so little time. These places provide an escape from our insecurities. Take the man or woman who thinks a promotion or a relationship will fix what is haunting inside. There’s always another rung to climb, a person to possess. Eventually, we only have so many escapes before we get caught. Living under the sun is a rather subtle addiction. You just kind of do it.
So who’s going to clean up the mess?
I’m in this for the few (however many that may be) who decided not to ignore. If you count yourself in that group today, listen in and reach out to me.
Why Women Lead Well
From quite a few years ago.
Some of my best leaders have been women. Many of them gave me something essential to growth-affirmation. Is this a motherly instinct? I can’t say for sure, but it has made a difference in my career path.
The Juggle has a great post (Is it Better When the Boss is a Mom) on the potential benefits of a woman leading the charge. I think a woman being the leader of a group or organization can be an advantage, but whatever the reason I am a better leader because of the influence of these ladies in my life.
Here are some reasons (in addition to affirmation) why women can be wonderful leaders at work and home:
- They seem to understand that life is wide as it is long.
- They have instinct that, as a man, I only wish I had.
- Many women are comfortable in their own skin.
- They often understand the importance of legacy (maybe the motherly thing).
- They know how to walk away.
Here’s to the women who lead and the difference they make.
What Millennials Want
Gave a talk yesterday to a group of mostly millennials. One thing was clear in our interactive experience, what millennials want is:
- Clarity
- Balance
- Epic
I’m sure there’s more to add to my list, but those 3 leaped out to me. I’ve read the data around what millennials want, versus what their parents wanted. It’s rare to see it upfront and close.
On the clarity front, it looks like many are overwhelmed by the pace and choices that make up existence. With so much screaming for attention, it’s not surprising. Keeping in mind that much of what screams is a complete waste of time. We know this in our gut, all the while the tracer bullets continue to fly.
You have to learn the art of saying no.
Balance goes hand in hand with clarity. With many employers demanding more and more, millennials (all of us) are fighting to not lose their lives, as they build a career. There’s a question mark hanging out there. Many are wondering can a career, as defined by the employer, live at peace with a great life.
Choosing a great life is the only way to find balance.
My talk yesterday was about leading an epic life. Some are disturbed by this because they want it and they know in their core it is the way we were meant to be, yet they find mediocrity all around. America has descended into a swamp filled with it. Others want it and are willing to do the work of finding an epic life. I know you see the difference. The choice between the two has always been in hand.
Your epic life was deposited into you in the beginning.
A Constant State of Thankfulness
I know it may seem strange that my dog, Bob Marley, would be my source of inspiration and reflection. I’m a dog lover and have been for most of my life. This little guy is seven and has been ill the last month or so. It’s the first time we’ve dealt with major sickness in the time we’ve had him. It caught my family by surprise.
The surprise was found in the nature of a first time, but it also caught me taking his constant companionship for granted. I’ll confess that I always thought of him as a constant, constant as the earth I walked on everyday. I know better.
As Bob Marley has been recovering (too soon to say full recovery), he reminds me everyday that now is what is constant. Epic living is found in that statement. There’s a chance you’re thinking that you’ve heard this story before. More flip advice from a world full of lists and how-to formulas. Maybe so, but ask yourself when you last said thank you for the following:
- The breath of life
- Your family (immediate)
- Your luck
- Your work (not your employer in this example)
- People who helped you get to where you’re at
- Friends who stuck with you when things got ugly
- Your health
I’m advocating the now because it breeds a constant state of thankfulness. Discovering thankfulness when it’s too late is painful and ripe of regret. You can start now, right now, if you want to.
The Changing Face of Work
In December of last year I caught this article on creativity. Specifically, how creativity is viewed in the work place. I found it rather ironic because of the changing face of work today. In a work world where so much is being turned upside-down, you’d think the creative would be more valued. I carry a bias toward the creative. I belong to that tribe, with great energy and vibe.
Between coaching clients, conversations with decision makers (small and large companies) and the written word, I get a strong sense of how work is changing. The following is not based in theory, and gives a sense of what is here and what’s to come:
- Employees will soon (1-3 years for the individual and the mid-market) be buying their own health insurance. The employer will contribute an annual dollar amount, but the buying part will be up to you
- Engagement in the work place will continue to drop until workers feel they have an equal say in what’s going to happen in their specific work function. The millennials are the catalyst here
- Fear will be a driver of innovation
- Knowledge transfer is a bigger deal than many think
- People who are looking for a job should pay attention to disruptive technology. It will either eliminate your job or create a new one. This is good advice for the employed as well
- For obvious reasons people will need, and maybe forced, to truly manage their lives with an “on-purpose” approach
The bullets above are sobering. Don’t lose you soul navigating the waters.
The Crazy Part of Thanksgiving
The crazy part of thanksgiving is we’re not that thankful-at least most of us. It’s not a conscious act that makes us un-thankful. Most people have good intentions. However, as you know, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Can you feel me here?
I used to wonder in my homeland why people tend to get thankful at Thanksgiving and during the general holiday season. I don’t any longer. It’s very clear that we Americans like entitlement. Yes, you heard me, we like entitlement(s). Look around and look within, the beast lives within. Whether we’re impatient for traffic to “get moving” or anger that we didn’t get a pat on the back from our employer, we feel like we’re owed. I won’t even pull out my list of embarrassing things in my past that made me feel entitled. I live a different life now than I did in those days past. Just the same, I have to keep careful watch over my reactions to circumstances that don’t cater to me.
Here’s some encouragement to consider:
- Take a moment and ponder present or past losses. When you do that, you’ll find out what’s worth being thankful for
- Find some way to remind yourself daily to be thankful. I use my iCloud calendar to do this. Find a system that works for you
- Exit the stuff not worthy of the gift of time. I can’t figure this one for you, it’s a dance you must do alone
- If the herd says go left, you should think hard about going right. The herd got us into this constant state of distraction
- Read this profile of a man who knew he was running out of time and did
Happy Thanksgiving!